In my head, this is all just a dream {monologue}

[Colette]

Danger, Danger

From the moment her eyes opened.... she felt something wash over her. Not being able to pin-point it. She went on with her day. Having a new group of kids come in, filling out the paperwork, making lunch, taking a nap. Everything seemed to go as if it was just another day.

But that feeling lingered.

It was nearly eight at night as she finally headed upstairs. Tucking the younger ones in, including her own twins. She smiled as Laura headed to her room to read before going to bed. It was then, that she thought it was the perfect time to have a little bit of time to just herself.

The house was seemingly quiet enough. Turning the lights down low, she closed her eyes, laying on her bed. Unable to sleep, or to think of anything to do, she stared at the ceiling. It was then, that it hit her like a ton of bricks. "Oh no..." She knew this feeling. She hated this feeling. Why now?

Temporal Duplication; It was a ability rarely seen now a days. And if Colette had anything to do about it, she wouldn't have it in the first place. For one, it wasn't easy to control (if she could control it). Two, it came at the worst moments. For instance, in Times Square, in broad daylight. People thought she had died. As the head of the mutant community, she learned quickly what it meant to have this ability. How it worked, but not when, or why it worked.

It was an ability to bring past and future versions of oneself back to the present. And it wasn't pleasnt, to say the least. It was difficult, and painful, and the last time it happened, she nearly scared the crap out of people. Taking in a deep breath, she knew she had no choice, or control. So she let go, and didn't fight it.

Feeling the tear of her future self emerge, she expected to fall unconcsious, like all the other times. But, apparently, this time was different. The version of herself was older, with wrinkles, and slightly grayed hair. "Your in danger."

"What?" To Colette, it seemed like a ghost. Not quite there, but... at the same time... there. "They're coming." Brows furrowed, she leaned up on her elbows. "Who?" She asked, feeling as if she was dreaming (beacause this has never happened before in all the history she had researched on this ability. So therefore, she must be dreaming.).

"They hate us. What we are. What we stand for. How we live, what we do. We, are all... in danger."

And just as quickly as it came, it evaporated. Leaving Colette bewildered, eyes wide as she looked around. "What the fuck... was that about?" She wondered. Danger, who's coming? Why do they hate us...?

[[T. B. C.]]

[Colette]

These feelings, the drown us

The Next Day...


It was like any other day, minus the odd thing that had happened to her last night. Sitting in the kitchen, she laughed as Dean made yet another visit. She grew concerned, since he'd been making more of these visits a habit of late. "Yeah, well, I think we've all been there. Sibling rivalry and all. He'll get use to it, as the next kid comes along." She smiled.

"True enough, I know me and Sam we're like that at one point. Hell, we're still like that." Dean laughed, pausing to check his watch. "So you'll watch them, then?" He asked lightly. Colette nodded, looking back into the living room as Logan played with a few of the other boys his age, and Regan sat there, playing with blocks. "Of course."

"Alright, well, I should start heading back home and surprise her then." Colette just smiled, nodding as she waved him off. "Go on, have a fun date with your wife." She laughed softly.

Watching him leave, she took to her feet and grabbed a glass from the cabinet and opened the fridge door, grabbing the gallon of freshly made iced tea and poured herself a glass. The entire day, she kept going over in her mind what she had told herself last night (which was ridiculous to think of. Talking to yourself, let alone your future self).

Taking a seat back at the table, she took a sip and that knowingly familiar feeling set in again. Her eyes closed, brows furrowing as she let it continue, wasting no energy in fighting it like she tried to last night. And then, as it happened last night, she found herself opening her eyes to be face to face with herself yet again. "Why?" She asked softly, crossing her legs (as if she was getting use to this). "Why is this changing now? Usually, I'm unconscious."

Her future self just smiled. "Everything changes, evolves." She answered. "So I'm evolving?" She half laughed. "Something like that, yes." She laughed back at present self. "Not like It gets easier on me, either. We deal, and move on. Like all the other times. Like Charles, and Laura... and the twins, and the kids here at the school. We keep moving forward."

Colette nodded, sipping on her iced tea. "I suppose you're right. " She paused, setting her glass down. "Who is coming?" She asked again. "I can't really say. I don't want to alter the time here, or what might happen. But remember, just like everything before. We survive, and we move on."

"Evolving and moving on, seems to be my... ou, life story." Pausing, she tilted her head. "What can you tell me?" She asked, leaning forward on the kitchen table.

"FBI, CIA, Homelance Security, Black Ops. Trained by the best of the best."

"What does that mean?" Colette asked, brows furrowed. "That, I can not say. You asked, I give. But, somethings I can't give you." Her future self replied. "But we're in danger, who is we?"

"Everyone. Mutants, X-anti's. X's... anyone that has powers. We're 'unnatural' as they say. They refuse to let us be." Seeing her body flicker, Colette closed her eyes, and when she opened them...

Her future self was gone....

[[T. B. C.]]

[Colette]

Makes me stronger

It was nearly two weeks later, and no future self…. Today was important. More important than any other charity meeting at the mutant HQ. Because today, they weren’t just spending cash to help a worthy cause. You see, today is the day she signs the papers that could ensure her a more prominent position in the future. Cliff-notes version: It basically ensured she had a seat on the council if she so decided to join. Within those papers rested many more responsibilities. But so much more than helping mutants control their powers. She, if she signed, had the right to put a group of medical mutants together and create a cure for cancer. Colette Richards; the cure for cancer.

Can you imagine?

She mingled on the floor, smiling, laughing, even dancing with a few men. All in all, it was going very well. She still wasn’t sure if she was going to sign. Sure, It was a true gift to be on the council, but she’d miss the kids…. She’d miss her home. The mansion she’s called home since Laura was two. Gosh, that was such a long time ago. She told herself with a soft smile as she stepped away from the group and ordered a nonalcoholic strawberry daiquiri.

One second, she was by herself, the next she was sipping the drink and feeling a tap on her shoulder. Turning slightly with raised brows, she nearly spit the drink out as her eyes landed on her future self. “Is it me, or am I not sensing you anymore?”

”You’re not, I’ve come too often for you to still feel me coming. It’ll be easier now.”

Colette just starred a moment before turning back to her drink. ”May I talk to you, in private?” Sighing, she took to her feet and lead the way to a meeting room that was empty. “More warnings, or are you here to tell me you can’t tell me anything… again?”

”I sense your mad. I understand, I was too at first. That was until I heard from me what I’m going to tell you now…” Pausing a moment she laughed softly. ”This is never going to get easy to say…”

“Just tell me.” Colette crossed her arms over her chest as she starred at herr future self.

“Sign.”

“Excuse me?”

”Sign the papers, Colette. I know you love your job. But we both know this job is for the future. It’s not this second. Your family will understand, Malcolm, will understand. But they are still coming, I want you prepared. But at the same time, I don’t want to alter this tim, because it can alter my…. Our future. And trust me Colette, when I tell you…. The future is something to wait for… it’s beautiful, peaceful… it’s everything you wanted it to be… and more.” She paused, looking back with a smile at the door. Colette stared, wondering if her future self still saw that future place, even while in the past.

”I have to go. Just remember… danger is near. One tip I can give you… talk to Essence, and then Ryder.” Before Colette could object, her future self quickly spoke again. ”Things are different now. He’s a father, to a beautiful girl. Give him a chance to help heal this wound…” She said as she pointed at her heart.

“How did you….”

“Colette, honey… I’m you…” She smiled softly as she slowly disappeared.

Covering her mouth, Colette just stood there… completely froze. Nearly five minutes passed before she opened the door and walked over to the Judge. “Mr. James. I’ll sign those papers now if you’d like…”

”I’d like that just fine Miss Richards, just fine.” He chuckled.

[[T. B. C]]

[Colette]

Hate is real

She wasn’t even sure if she wanted to do this, let alone go to his house. How long had it been? Oh yeah… Six, seven years since she last saw Ryder? Yeah, when he was trying to control Charles. And before that? He tried to kill her, Laura, and made her think he had killed her husband. So why… why on earth was she even THINKING of going to this mans house?

Because she said too.

“Talk to Essence, talk to Ryder… might help heal you… blah.” Colette sighed, shaking her head as she sat in traffic. Hands on the wheel, she hung her head. “Come on, that was… years ago. I’m healed, right?” Pausing, she quickly answered herself. “Right…. No… fuck.” As the light changed, she rolled down the street.

The only reason she had the address was all because of Emma. God bless her heart, she had no idea why she was looking for him or Essence. But Colette shrugged it off as having to do something about their new baby. Whatever, sometimes you have to lie, right? Sighing, she pulled into the circular driveway, up to the front door and sat there a moment.

Finally, she exited the car and took to the door, but before knocking she read a note. ’Singing at Blue Moon, from 7-12.’ “Fuck.” Turning around, she climbed back into the car and started heading downtown.

“The more I drive, the more nervous I get. The more nervous I get, the more likely it is I just take this gas guzzler back home.” She told herself. But despite stating the obvious, she continued on.

Pulling into a parking space (finally), she hopped out and went inside. The first thing that hit her was the loud music, then the smell of alcohol and cigarettes. Taking in a deep breath she looked around for him as she went to the bar. As she sat down, she looked behind the woman serving to the clock, it was nearly 11pm.

”What can I get for you, Colette? Ash seemed to appear out of no where again. Smiling, she shrugged. “Water and Ryder Forrester.” Ash raised a brow but nodded with a light quirky smile. “Comin’ right up.” Ash slid the water bottle to her and yelled for Ryder in the back room.

Two minutes later, and he emerged laughing as he waved at the men playing poker in the backroom. “See you guys later!” As he turned, his eyes hit blue eyes. And instantly, he knew who it was. “Colette.” He nodded at her.
“Ryder.” She said, swallowing roughly afterwards.

“Can we talk somewhere in private?” Ash pulled back up to the bar, leaning over and point at a door in the back. “Out back is free.” Colette smiled as she took to her feet.

“Thanks darling.”

Ryder took the lead, opening the door and holding it open for Colette. Suspicious, she slowly exited the pub and found herself under little white lights. “So, what’s this about?” Colette turned to him with all seriousness.

“Our past, and our kids’ future. I don’t want to admit this…. Ryder, I need your help.”

---

Three hours passed, and the two found themselves smiling softly at each other. Colette realized people really do change, when they find someone special enough to help them change. Essence was good for him, music was his psychologist, and his daughter was his everything.

“Can I ask you something?” Her heart quickly became heavy as nervousness set it again.

“Ask away.” He smiled.

“Why didn’t you call?” Despite the years of better times, she couldn’t control the crack in her voice. “You knew I waited. I waited an entire year Ryder. Charles came, and… I knew despite how I felt for you… I had to move on. I loved him, I did…. But… I loved you first.”

Ryder covered his mouth as he watched her lips move. ”Lets leave it in the past, huh?” Colette quickly shook her head, causing Ryder to sigh. “Lets just say… Kai was involved with me not calling you…”

Silence.

Colette nodded softly. “Now I know, thank you.” She looked at her watch and realized the time. “Laura’s going to kill me.” She chuckled, wiping away one stray tear. “I uh, I better go.” She took to her feet and quickly gave him a hug. “Tell Ess hi for me?”

”Of course. I’ll kiss Kyenne too.”

Laughing softly, Colette nodded. “That too. I’ll call you if I hear anything new from myself.” Laughing again, she shook her head. “This is never going to get easy is it?”

Ryder smirked. “Nope.”

Smiling, she waved once more as she got into her car and drove away.