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Post by elena on Dec 25, 2009 23:15:25 GMT -5
Mascara was running down her face as she stumbled over her own feet. She was sobbing with her best friend in her hand. That bottle of Jack had been there for her when no one else was. She was alone in this world and no one seemed to care. She looked down at the outfit she had on and let out a loud chuckle. "This is all a joke.." She said laughing and sobbing at the same time. "None of it's real..." Elena hiccuped as she made her way on the bridge. She couldn't walk a straight line. Having almost a whole bottle of Jack Daniels can do that to you. Walking over to the side of the bridge she leaned over looking down at the lifeless water. People were disappearing left and right, and who would care if she disappeared. No one. She took a deep shaky breath. She press her cheek to the cold metal of the bridge railing. The water was pitch black like her heart at the moment. She could careless about what she looked like leaning over the bridge. People could think what they wanted she wouldn't be around long to hear what they have to say. "All I wanted was to be loved....Was it really that hard?" She choked on the words as she stood up pressing the bottle to her lips. She took a long swig and let the liquid flow down her throat. The burning sensation that usually followed was masked with her depression. Not even alcohol could ease her pain. Her life was a block hole of nothingness and everyone else seemed to agree....she wasn't worth saving. Elena grew up with a hard life. Becoming an alcoholic at a young age can do that people. Being raped didn't help much either.... If she wasn't having dreams about being left alone she was having dreams about being raped...over and over again. She wished that someone would play God for her and end it all, but she soon had to figure out that the only one that could help here was herself. She was the one who had to do. She had sat at home staring at the wall thinking of all the possibilities of how to end her life. Overdose, Hanging, Self mutilation, Simply pointing a gun to her head. All of it sounded like something that would be left with a blank mind...but she wanted to be able to think right before she died. She wanted to end it knowing exactly what she was doing...and why. What better place than the Manhattan Bridge? A place she passed everyday. A place that was a part of her life that she was willing to lose. That's what shook her. She was willing to lose it all. Give up her breathing...her heart beat. Give it all up just to stop that pain. The pain that would pulse through her blood with every heartbeat. She could forget this all....Sober up and forget all, but would her life really be the same. The world felt like it was ending anyway...why stay around to watch it all go up in flames? Once again the thought of anyone who would care she was gone passed through her mind. She shook it away gritting her teeth. She looked back over the edge of the bridge. Drowning...If she jumped from here she wouldn't be able to feel her body once she hit the freezing water, but she would be able to think. Think. Something she didn't always do... She could fall over and it was all in within a matter of time. It would all disappear... |
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Post by Asher on Dec 25, 2009 23:27:54 GMT -5
Everything was more complicated than it already was. With Lucifer walking the earth, and enslavement camps.. Not to mention the mutants who have died protecting humanity. He wondered if human kind would change their outlook on mutants if they survived this? Or would things simply go back to the way they were before? Soft melodies flooded his ears as he walked down the street. Demons found him odd, so they never attacked. It had to do with his mediumship. He could see them for what they really were; souls of the damned. And for some reason, they were scared of that. Even now, there was one following him; asking for help. How could he help something that was already dead? "I know you can see me! I know you can hear me! PLEASE don't ignore me!" Asher simply turned up his Ipod as he continued to walk onto the bridge. Something told him to look up. It was like an odd sensation. Maybe that's what fate was.. or was it destiny? There was a girl standing near the side, looking down and over the bridge at the darkened water. What was she doing--there was a bottle in her hand. " Oh god.." Chills ran up and down his spine as he froze in place--not only five feet from this woman. He removed his earbuds, and cleared his throat. " Please don't." He spoke softly out to her. How could something be so horribly bad that someone would want to end their life? What was her world like...? Where was her loved ones...? Did they know what she was doing..? " It can't--" He swallowed hard, his tongue darting out and licking at his lips. " It can't be that bad.." |
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Post by elena on Dec 25, 2009 23:55:57 GMT -5
Jumping at the voice she dropped her bottle and it crashed onto the ground. She looked into the eyes of the person who was speaking and she saw a man. She swallowed hard before looking down at her bottle broken on the ground. She felt the sob rise in her throat. Even Jack would leave her at a time like this....
Elena looked back up at the man as he spoke as if he knew her. She shook her head tears flowing down her face. "You shouldn't even worry about me.... Trust me...I'm not worth it." She took a deep breath and wiped her face. "And it may not be as bad as I think it is...but I'm weak." She felt her heart ache. "And I have no patience for things to get better.
She looked at the railing as it whispered sweet lullabies to her. Placing both hands on it she continued to look over the edge at the water. "It's really a beautiful site..." She smiled with little effort. She glanced over at him. "Would if really be so bad to go out in such a pretty scenery?" She was slurring some of her words, but she knew what she was saying.
She was sure about ever word that was coming out of her mouth. It was all something that ran through her mind, and it all seemed clear that she was supposed to dead. She was not supposed to be hear walking the earth. She was just another body with a helpless soul that God created for his own enjoyment.
Elena bent slightly taking off her boots. The cold air hit her feet and she closed her eyes. It was all she needed to coax her to place her hands back on the rail. She took a breath and hopped over the railing. She stood on the outside ledge and held onto the railing.
Her heart was racing. The thought of the cold water peircing her body aroused it in a sick way. She glanced behind her to see that the man was still behind her. "I'm Elena though I don't think it matters for long..." She swallowed the lump in her throat. "If you stay and watch atleast tell this story to your kids..." She knew she was being harsh, and that he was only trying to help her.
Back in the day when she used to smile and sing...she would have found him extremely cute, and she would have flirted her ass off to get him to give her his number. That didn't matter now. She played with the thought of leaning forward.
Still holding onto the rail she leaned forward caressing the line between life and death. What could this guy say to her to change her mind? Nothing... Not to mention if he stayed to watch her jump...well he would probably never wear a smile on those lips that seemed to yell "kiss me, kiss me" to Elena.
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Post by Asher on Dec 26, 2009 0:14:48 GMT -5
"You shouldn't even worry about me.... Trust me...I'm not worth it." She took a deep breath and wiped her face. "And it may not be as bad as I think it is...but I'm weak." She felt her heart ache. "And I have no patience for things to get better."
He moved a bit closer. "Who told you, you weren't worth it?" He asked carefully. He didn't want this girl to die, didn't want to have her be a ghost and following him around and talking about unfinished business. Not that he was selfish, he was far from it. But this girl.. she was so beautiful..
"You're not weak." He spoke up a bit louder as he took careful steps closer. "What you are doing is weak." Maybe he wasn't suppose to say that, but it was too late now, wasn't it? "Hey.. I'm Asher.." He was right beside her now as he dropped his voice gently.
"It's really a beautiful sight..." She smiled with little effort. She glanced over at him. "Would if really be so bad to go out in such a pretty scenery?"
"Yes." Damn it, think before you speak. He told himself. He was at a loss of words. What could you say to someone who was so determined to die? He watched in horror as she flung herself to the outside of the bridge. "Hey, hey, hey." He reached out, grabbing her wrist.
"I'm Elena though I don't think it matters for long..." She swallowed the lump in her throat. "If you stay and watch atleast tell this story to your kids..."
He looked up and into her eyes--wow, they were beautiful. "Elena.. why is someone so beautiful doing something so ugly? How bad can your life be? Think about it.." He spoke softly. "You're not dying. I'm not..." He sighed. What the hell.. "Do you believe in fate? Because I do.. Fate brought me here.. and I don't think it was to watch you do this.. I think it was to help you, Elena."
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Post by elena on Dec 26, 2009 0:33:18 GMT -5
"Who told me I wasn't worth it?" She paused thinking the thought as she played with the thought of free falling through the air. "The world did." She said bluntly. She listened him talk only catching glances of his faces as she played with her grip on the railing.
Hearing him call her beautiful was not helping. She knew she was pretty, but hearing someone like him say that....It made her heart do flips. She couldn't go through with it easily if he kept this up. She took a deep breath and looked down as she spoke. "Fate?" She questioned looking back up into his eyes her ice blue ones glazed over with tears.
"I don't believe in anything anymore...to tell you the truth Asher." She felt her voice crack. Why would God send her someone like this the one time she was following through with what she thought was needed to be done. "And my life... is, has..and was...very bad." She felt her sob rising.
Elena cried for a moment tightening her grip on the rail. Could she let go? She had to. But what about this poor sould who would watch her fall to her death? She sighed straightening her act a bit. "All I ever wanted was to be loved....but no... God thought it was asick joke to hand me love....twice and then pull it away."
She looked up at the sky. "Well are you happy now?" She screamed at the sky. Her grip slipping, but Asher's hand was there on her wrist before she could blink. Her vision blurred with tears as she looked back at him. "Why do you care so much?" She asked outloud, but what she thought in her mind was a little more blunt...
Why do you want me to stay alive....there is no true reason for me to be on this earth.... let me die....please..
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Post by Asher on Dec 26, 2009 0:42:21 GMT -5
"Who told me I wasn't worth it?" She paused thinking the thought as she played with the thought of free falling through the air. "The world did."
"Well, the world is wrong. It happens." He forced a smile, showing that sometimes things could work out. He was afraid she'd just let go, so he placed his other hand on the rail. There was no way he was going to let go..
"All I ever wanted was to be loved....but no... God thought it was asick joke to hand me love....twice and then pull it away. Well are you happy now? Why do you care so much?"
Why did he care? Maybe it was hi southern influence? Maybe it was the fact he was taught to lend a helping hand when it was needed? "I care.. because.. I'm human. We're built with the emotion to care, and yeah, sometimes we care too much and get our hearts broken.."
He swallowed hard, hoping this was working. "You say you want loved--but what if I told you I could love you?" He let it hang in the air, his eyes glued to hers. "But you have to step down from there, Elena."
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Post by elena on Dec 26, 2009 1:05:18 GMT -5
Her heart dropped. "Love me?" She swallowed the thought. How she yearned for another bottle of Jack...and to be in this man's arms just from the thought of him willing to love her because he didn't want her to die. Now that was a real man. Giving up something of his for someone.....
She felt the sob rise in her throat. She let it out with ease. She turned around facing him on the ledge. Her bare feet touching the conrete with sickening comfort. She let out a deep breath. "How do I know what will happen?" She choked out, but she held up a hand stopping him from a reply.
"I just want to know what would happen if I agreed to step down?" She paused feeling all her worries rise. She was beggining to feel herself sober up as she replayed herself hitting the water with a loud smack. She never knew a sound like that could make someone feel loved, but she knew that cold New York water would love her.
It would caress her, hold her in it's arms until she was asleep for good....That was what she wanted. She didn't want to risk loosing love another time. She wouldn't be able to handle it. The only way to not think of all these things was to focus on all the reasons why she was doing this....
It was hard looking in the face of the man who was trying to play her savior. She leaned forward knowing the smell of whiskey on her breath was strong. She planted a kiss on his lips and pulled away.
He would take it as a kiss of surrender....but she took it as a kiss goodbye. She had just met him, but she felt the need to give him thanks for atleast trying to care....atleast one sould might miss her....
Although she was sure when she was gone he would forget her....
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Post by Asher on Dec 26, 2009 1:18:58 GMT -5
"Love me? How do I know what will happen?" She choked out, but she held up a hand stopping him from a reply. "I just want to know what would happen if I agreed to step down?"
He took a breath, at least she was thinking about it. "If you step down.." He stared into her blue orbs. "I'll take you into my arms.." He let that sink in, his dark brown eyes smiling at her. "And all of your worries, and your fears, they'll melt away when I kiss you tenderly, Elena."
He only hoped this was enough to get her to come down. He wasn't lying, he could see himself loving this woman, helping this woman; until the day they died. "You want to be loved, Elena? Then let me love you."
He let go of the railing that he was gripping so tight and held out a hand to her. "Take my hand."
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Post by elena on Dec 26, 2009 2:09:08 GMT -5
She pondered the thought. She really did.
She stood there playing the image of being in his arms and being loved. It was what she wanted. He was appealing...and he was a good man she could tell just by looking at him, but why did she still feel like the comfort of the water was more powering than his.
Elena was gone in her mind. She left her body stading there on the ledge facing that handsome man who was vowing to love her. She took a detour in her life and went through all the memories she had stored. More bad than good. Each one she came across she felt sick and felt the need to sob.
When she felt the time to quit thinking about her life she shook them away bringing her back into reality. She was staring into his eyes seeing the desperation in his eyes. He wanted so badly for her to come down....But she couldn't.
She couldn't let him make a promise he couldn't keep. She started to cry. "Oh Asher. You're such a good man." She leaned forward and placed a hand on his cheek......
She felt his heart pulsing through his skin, and she felt hers skipping beats. "If oonly you have found me sooner...." She paused. The cry turned into a sob. She had to take a deep breath in order for him to understad her words...
Her last words.
"But I've already made up my mind." She closed her eyes and stepped back off the ledge letting her hands slip off. The feeling of her stomach floating as she fell took away the pain. She didn't scream.....she didn't even cry....
All the way down she had a smile on her face. And then she hit the water. She was right the water peircing her body would be comforting....and with that she couldn't move....
Couldn't breathe....
Couldn't love....
Couldn't
Live.
Her last thought was how she wished someone would remember her. She prayed in her mind....though it wouldn't help now.... That Asher atleast would remember her.
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Post by Asher on Dec 26, 2009 2:18:11 GMT -5
"Oh Asher. You're such a good man."
"And you're a good woman." His eyes were pleading with her now, urging her to take his hand.
"If oonly you have found me sooner...."
His heart sank deep into the pit of his stomach as he stared at her. She was going to go through with this.. wasn't she?
"But I've already made up my mind."
She let go..
He reached over the railing, hoping and praying that he could grasp onto her and pull her up. But it was too late. He watched in shock as her body free fell to the dark water below. Hearing the splash, he came out of his frozen state. "ELENA!"
But she was gone.. and he knew it. "You tried.." Came a voice, his head turned, seeing the same woman from before. "SHUT UP!" He screamed at her. "YOU ARE DEAD I CAN'T HELP YOU! BUT SHE WAS ALIVE! I COULD HAVE HELPED HER!"
"But.. you tried.." Was all her reply. He glared back at her, grabbing the steel knife in his pocket and waving it at her--watching her shape disappear before him. Tears welled in his eyes as he went to the edge of the bridge and looked down--
She was floating--with a smile on her face...
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